... ugghh....

There are at least 4 things I could write about and have no real inclination to do so. Eventually I'll get around to them I guess, but at the moment I just can't get up enough ... umph? All in all it was sort of a weird day. The weather changed to humid as well as hot, and then it rained. It's coastal weather for a different longitude and latitude and since I'm not there, it makes it a lot more depressing. Most people get homesick because they leave home... I get homesick for a country I only spent 3 months in. Weird but true.

Over the last couple of weeks I got to move my Beta fish to the small back up tank, because one of the Molly fish decided it'd be a good idea to eat him. The Tetra (aka Tetra-loid), who I thought was insane, was actually running interference for the Beta. Beta would get hassled into a corner, the Molly would begin removing more of his fins, and then Tetra-loid would come zooming in and whack the Molly in the side, while the Beta would swim away at speed. The only fish that Molly respects now is the Red Phantom Tetra-loid. She's removed most of the scales off the top of the other Molly's head. He trawls the very top of the tank now, because if he goes any lower, she removes MORE of his scales.

Meanwhile, I got some more Tetras and some more Pepper Cory Cats... One Black Phantom Tetra, one Serpae Tetra and two little corys. This is how I discovered that the Molly is something of a bitch. I haven't had the other fish for long, but I suspect I will be finding a different home for the Molly Hag. Since the pH balance is FINALLY under control, I can get some more Tetras, which is what I wanted in the first place. I'll have to get a few more Corys too, because .... i -know- I put two Pepper Cats in there, but I almost never see them. They're to busy hiding from the Molly Hag. She seems to really hate the Peppers, and I suspect that if there were more of them, they'd be a bit more... comfortable. More friends for the Tetra-loid as well, considering they're all so freaked by the Molly. At least there are lots of places to hide, and the resident Tank Hag can't get to all of them, but it really irritates me to see them all clinging to one side of their home in a cluster you'd normally not see that many species in.

If there is one thing I will not tolerate, it's a Bully, and I do not care if its a different species or not.

The Beta on the other hand is living a solitary life in the 3 gallon tank. He spent the first week looking all over the tank for the other fish. Okay, so there's a lot of speculation on my part, but after a while he went and did what appeared to be pouting in a corner. I'll have to get him some friends, as in a couple of Corys and a few Tetras. Before all that happens though, I have to get the cloudy stuff cleared up in his tank. Not sure what's going on with that, but the enzymes seem to be clearing things up. Slowly. Betas are a bit hardier than the average fish, which makes me hopeful that he'll be alright.

*sighs* We'll see what happens I guess. With my luck, everything is going to kick off.

If you haven't already guessed my luck is awful.

Absentee Camera

Every once in a while I actually remember to take my camera with me, because I've spotted something on the way to work, or something along the way that I'd like to take a picture of before it's gone. This happens frequently when I'm on the road. They'll be a cloud formation that's just totally unique, or the way the light is slanting through the trees onto dried out grass. Or dawn over the divide, above mountain peaks jutting up from a thick low fog bank. There was the sunset that happened right after a huge storm last September that literally emblazoned the sky with broad sweeps of vivid pinks, yellows, oranges and light blues. It looked liked a shattered stained glass window thrown into the sky.

And I didn't have my damned camera with me in all these instances.

So when I saw this in the small grass area in front of where I park my car at work, I brought my camera the next day. This had also happened last year, and I was about to go outside and snap a shot of them, but before I could, someone plucked them and brought them to me as a gift. I didn't have the heart to tell him that I prefer my flowers alive, and smiled my thanks while inwardly cursing my wonderful luck.

Anyway, I believe these are called Naked Ladies. These are growing wild near my workplace, and I see them every year. This year, there were a lot of them.

There are several more sets of Naked Ladies on either side of this one, and I had a hell of a time getting this picture, because they've nestled themselves comfortably inside a rather unfriendly sticker bush. I have scars to prove it.

I'm glad I took this picture when I did.

Because the next day the county very helpfully parked their umpteen ton tractor on it.

..... i find progress very irritating sometimes.....

*sighs*

The Aquarium Saga

When I asked for an aquarium a couple of years ago, I don't think I had fully contemplated the difficulty in actually having fish live in it. An aquarium is a wonderful thing when you get it set up just the way you like it, with colored rocks, gravel, sand, ... whathaveyou. Then you turn on the light in the aquarium hood and you admire your handiwork, and think,"Yes, if I were a fish, I'd love to live in there, with the little treasure chest to hide in, and the fake plant life to play in."

You know what? Ignorance really is bliss. Because there are factors that you tend to ignore when you're looking at your handiwork, and patting yourself on the back. Such as... oh, the pH balance of the water (which is freaking high, and it doesn't go down regardless of how much neutralizing agent I dump in there). Or insignificant things like 3 gallon tanks don't have enough water in them to keep a stable temperature to the water (which is also a problem if you have certain types of fish). There is also the possibility that the brand, spanking new pump, that came with the tank, that has a fantastic track record of not dying, does the unthinkable. It dies.

But, let us go back to actually putting fish into your perfectly set up tank. When I started, I put three Red Phantom Tetras into a three gallon tank to "start the tank". Which means introducing enough fishy poop and right types of bacteria to help get the bio-filter going. One tetra died at the end of the first week. That was to be expected, because he was tiny and unfortunately for the tiny, they don't do well in really wacky tap water. Tap water that is actually from a lake higher up on our mountain divide. Tap water that has a pH balance of 7.8, probably higher, given that my tester only goes up that high. It's also hard water, and is treated with... god only knows what. So, when fishy number 1 expired, I was saddened, but not surprised. The other two fish went on happily living in the 3 gallon tank for about 2 months. Then I introduced the Peppered (I got the name!) Cory Cat... who died unexpectedly 13 days later. I have no idea what happened, but I was annoyed.

During all of this, I'd been running water down to the pet-store to have it tested... and tested... and more tested. They kept saying,"You're water is fine. Just need to lower the pH." After a month of trying to lower the pH, and failing with wild abandon, I asked if they have fish that like sky-high pH balanced water. "OH! Sure we do!"

.... why the HELL didn't you say that to begin with?! WHY?!!

Oh, and,"Try changing your filter. It might be a bad filter."

*my eyes roll beseechingly to the heavens*

This is how I found myself standing poised over my 3 gallon fish tank with a bag of new filters clutched in my hand... and realizing that the pump had died. In which case the filters would do me no good whatsoever. Gee... maybe all my problems were from a bad PUMP!! It ran for 2 months and DIED! I peered into the tank at the two little tetras. They peered back. They looked fine. Listing, but fine. I stood up and decided that the two tetras were in fact mutants.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Fish? nah...

Spider-fish? no.

X-Fish?...

Tetra-loids! That'll work.

At this point I took a second look at them and began to wonder if my Cory Cat hadn't been murdered. The tetras appeared innocent, but ... Let's just say my suspicions have been aroused.

The next day I once again made an appearance at the pet-shop, this time with a dead pump. Much exclaiming and shock was tossed about as the pump from an eclipse system was examined, prodded and bashed against a professional hand. Apparently this doesn't happen often. In fact they said something to the effect that this hadn't happened in 6 years. Yes, I'm special. At this point I threw my hands up in disgust and bought a 6 gallon tank, a back up pump/filter, and some more decorations and gravel for the new tank.

I set up the new tank, using the water from the old tank, and waited patiently for a day, for the crap to settle in the new tank. Not literal crap. When you put gravel into a new tank, they tell you to rinse the gravel until it rinses clear. This is in fact bull sh!t. You can rinse your new gravel until doomsday, and it will never rinse clear. Thus when you put water into your new set up, you will have the silt of ages happily fluffing around the tank for, in my case, three days. Yes, I rinsed for hours, and it doesn't help much.

Meanwhile one of the Tetra-loids had begun to swim with a pronounced list. I wasn't too worried because this particular Tetra-loid has been strange since day one. But, he'd been eating, pooping, swimming and bullying his fellow mutant for some time now. His rather tattered buddy wasn't much better. He almost never stays in an standard north position, but I chalked this up to the fact that his eyes are not in the same spot on either side of his head. If your world is askew, then so should you be. However, by the next morning I'd lost another mutant fish... and creepily he was stashed in the same place I'd found the Cory's corpse. Face first down, in the middle of the grass plant. Took me forever to get it out of there. The whole time the last Tetra-loid looked on from afar. Granted that you can't really get far away in a 6 gallon tank, but still, it watched my every move. Although I watched closely he never actually rubbed his fins together in morbid glee.

A few days later I decided to thumb my nose at Fate and bought myself a really nice little Beta fish (aka Japanese Fighting Fish). He lived in a plastic bowl for a day, then I decided I'd pop him into the big tank and see how he'd do. So far, he's just fine, although he managed to get his tippy tip fins on his tail shredded. None of other other fish in there currently are aggressive towards him, and he's not aggressive towards them. I suspect he was sleeping, and got his tail fins caught in a prickly type plastic plant (I'll be removing it soon, as it's tried to kill two fish so far by trapping them between itself and the tank wall) in the tank... Panicked when he realized he was caught, and did the damage himself. But I can't say that for certain.

A few days after I got the Beta, I decided I'd get some of the fish that supposedly do well in high pH balanced water. Anything that bears live young are supposed to be alright with that, which means Guppies, Mollies and Platys. Guppies were out. First... I'm not fond of Guppies, and secondly the Beta, although quite placid with the Tetra-loid, may lose himself to blood-thirsty aspirations when presented with a small bodied fish, dragging a damned banner behind it, in all its fluttery, colorful, delicate glory. This leaves me with Mollies and Platys. I asked about Platys, and was presented with Mollies instead. Quite frankly I can't tell the difference between the two. Anyway, the Mollies, of which I purchased two, are currently living in the tank with a very very placid Beta, and the Tetra-loid. No deaths have occurred yet, but that may change.

Why? Well, because the Tetra-loid has gone insane. He thinks he's a barracuda. He's staked out the middle of the tank and nips anyone either coming into his 'territory' (except the Beta), or showing any sort of display. The Mollies like to display at each other with their colorful little bodies (not that sort of displaying, that's just sick. Shame on you.). Tetra-loid doesn't like this at all. This shameless display must cease IMMEDIATELY! When he's not playing at fish gestapo, he's attempting to school with the Mollies, who given his behavior, want nothing to do with him. He's like a stalker. Nice one minute, evil psycho the next.

In his mind its all about the schooling, and Mollies don't school. "Why won't you school? Stop showing off at each other! This isn't how it's supposed to be! SCHOOL DAMNIT! ITS BEEN SOO LOOOOONG!" If he had hair, I'm sure he would've pulled it all out by now.

This is in part my fault, as I haven't gotten him replacement Tetras... although with the way he's been behaving I'm not sure its such a good idea to introduce naive new fish to the tank. Its like dumping a bunch of teenagers at the camp where Jason resides. Or telling a bunch of cute girls that Norman Bates runs a fine upstanding motel.

*sighs* And the whole reason I wanted an aquarium was because I thought it'd be nice to watch the fish swim around. Relaxing you know?

.... the car accident was more relaxing... sheesh!

Random AZ

While in AZ (you can petition to stop the Arizona stories if you wish), as I've said before, I had a lot of free time on my hands. Thus I found myself spending a lot of time wandering around downtown Phoenix, and also sitting in the little shopping area across the street from the hotel. There was a little waterfall there that was surrounded by small stone seats. You'd think this would have provided some respite from the heat, but it only made it humid. Despite that, I found myself sitting here quite often thinking deep and quite possibly meaningless thoughts.

There were other places to sit under misters and in the shade, but I tended to end up sitting on a little hot stone seat. Mostly because when I tried relaxing on one of the benches outside a Cold Stone Ice Cream shop, which is where I took this photo:

... it made the patrolmen nervous. Nervous enough to come over and ask me if I needed water... or to go inside to cool off... And to ask why I hadn't taken off my sweater if I was too hot. Then they wanted ID, and asked where I was staying. They also sniffed me. As in, leaned in close and took a deep inhale through the nose. Alrighty then. At a guess, they were worried I was homeless and they didn't want me expiring from heat exhaustion on a bench in their shopping/business district. Paperwork is such a hassle these days when bodies are involved. In reality I was just sitting on the bench with my head tilted as far back as it would go, so I could stretch out the vertebrae in my neck. Traction feels good on a neck with aggravated nerves you know. Apparently it also makes you look drunk.

In reality I was comparing the palm trees of summer Phoenix AZ, to the pine, fur and oak trees where I live, during winter covered in heaps of snow.

In my opinion, the best time to truly appreciate a fresh snowfall is at daybreak when everything looks blue, untouched and is perfection held motionless in silence. Mist is still clinging to the taller branches, the snow remains unbroken pristine. It feels like you're the only thing alive and aware on mornings like this.

For whatever reason, the palm trees drifting slightly in the breeze high above my head, while stretching out my neck reminded me of a morning snowfall. Not the same, and yet... similar in feel and experience.

The New Tenant

As some of you know, I set up my little 3 gallon aquarium in June and managed to get two fish to survive in there until now. Rest assured that the two little Red Phantom Tetras are doing just fine, despite the abnormally high PH of the water. I've been trying to get it to go down, but haven't had much success even with the PH balancer I bought at the pet shop. Apparently the Tetras I have, have adapted to it which I was told was amazing. Usually they all die. This is what I get for living high on a mountain with water that comes from a dammed lake. Very hard water, with a high PH balance and added chlorine that makes it smell and taste like I've dived into a swimming pool.

All that aside I was told today by the fish guy extraordinaire that the water was fine and I could get some fish today. I could get just about any fresh water fish they had. Except Red Phantom Tetras, or Tetras in general because they're sensitive to high PH. *sag* Well hell... I think he noticed my immediate depression, and suggested I get a Cory Cat. "They're like roaches," (I'm add libbing) he told me,"When I moved up here, I had to give away my Corys. I had 4, but when I went to give them to the person, I could only find 3." So he emptied the tank, loaded it up in his car with all his worldly possessions and drove the 6 hours to his new home. Upon arriving he went to set up his tank, and started filling it. .. and out comes the missing Cory. It was just fine. Now that's a hardy fish. Hopefully I won't kill him. :P

So, I came home with a small Spotted Cory Cat! I'm not sure if that's right though, because all the pictures I find on the Internet don't look like him. Here he is!

There are all kinds you can get, but I liked the spots and the light eye color. It's hard to see, but he also has iridescent blue stripes behind his gills. They're so pretty flashing in the light. Did you know they blink? They don't have eyelids, but they can pull their eye down inside their head to clean foreign material from their eyes. Supposedly they do one eye at a time, but mine has been blinking both at the same time. I hope he's not smashing his brain matter into mush. And I found out they blink because I watched him for an obsessive two hours to make sure he was going to get along with the persnickety Red Phantoms. They have had a love hate relationship with each other since the one died some months back. I can't say I understand the mind of fish, but it would do them a world of good to have another three Red Phantoms in there with them. They're happiest in a small school. They've torn each others fins to splinters. I'd say shreds, but it doesn't look like shreds.

The little Cory has been very active since I put him in the tank. Actually I'm sort of worried he's going to kill himself from sheer exhaustion. The up side is the Red Phantoms are much more active since the Cory is so active. Usually they hide in the little treasure chest all day. Now they're being more adventurous and hiding behind a spindly fake plant. Here's the proof. I can actually take a picture of the little Red without him spooking. The Phantoms have been trying to school with the newcomer and its just not working, because his swimming pattern is too erratic. Makes for some good laughs watching them try and keep up with the Cat as he zooms all over the tank. Up, down, up to the surface to skim, then down again behind the rock... then he goes foraging in the gravel for a while and the Phantoms don't know what to make of that at all.

Now all I have to do is pray he doesn't drop dead on me. I like him too much already!

What Do You Think?

During my years of trundling up and down the mountainside, to work and back, I have witnessed many off the wall things. A bear being chased by a bunch of dogs do a somersault through a barbwire fence. A wild Tom Turkey doing his best to scare off passing cars, with his sumo-style stomp and feather display, from the center of the road. A car full of morons making a u-turn on a blind corner... veeerrrrrry sloowwwlllyyy. A flasher standing by the side of the road during winter (Not the appropriate time of year dude.) But I have to say that tonight's commute experience was the one that topped it all.

For almost a week now there has been a dead skunk laying in the middle of the road at a particularly bad corner. Normally the Turkey Vultures would have taken care of it by now, but as I said, the corpse is in a bad section of the road, and Vultures however ugly are not stupid. Skunk Corpse smells awful. You have the stench of skunk, mixed with the stench of death, and it makes even me gag. There is no keeping it out of your car, even if you have all the vents closed. We commuters have learned not to breath for the 45-50 seconds (at 55 mph) that it takes you get past the really ripe dead skunk and its aurora of cloying haze.

So, here I am driving home, a little later than usual. Which means I was not surrounded by home seeking commuters who don't really care if they're speeding. This turned out to be a good thing, because as I came up on 'Skunk Way' which is a blind corner I had to slam on the breaks and swerve to the right side of the road, and then swerve back to avoid a parked car. Why you ask? Because there was a man standing in the center of the road leaning over the Skunk Corpse with a spray bottle in his hand. I slowed. What the hell is he doing?! He's going to get himself killed! As I watched in stunned amazement via the rear view mirror this man sprays the skunk corpse with a bottle of Fabreeze. FABREEZE!! The man is risking death to spray roadkill with AIR FRESHENER?!

O.o

.... i drove the rest of the way home in stunned silence. Okay, not exactly true. I was listening to a Lily Allen CD, but usually I'm singing along with it. Good God, man! Yes, the smell is totally offensive, but what got into that pea sized brain of yours to try de-oderizing roadkill???

I think this must be some sort of all time high for freaky instances of Road Hazards R Us. Am I wrong? Do things like this happen to YOU? Am I just special?

What do you think?

Mistakes

Last night I dreamed. Not that this is unusual, but generally my dreams are a lot more ... zombie-horror flick-ish. Bloodshed, mayhem, violence, screaming, breathing closet walls.... etc. Most of them are in vivid color and are too complex to completely remember. Rarely do I have dreams where it's peaceful enough for me to feel at ease, which is what makes last nights dream so unusual... and weird.

From what I can remember, I was floating, probably without a body, and it was quiet, peaceful. I was just drifting in darkness, looking around me, watching stars, planets, galaxies, and a multitude of other entities of space floating with me. There was no weight to drag me down, no worries to cloud my mind... just drifting.

And a little girl's voice, breathy and light with quiet cheer, next to my ear said,"Why do you think there are so many stars, planets and galaxies out here?"

I thought about it a moment, and replied,"I don't know. Why?"

The voice laughed,"These are all of God's trial runs. His mistakes. He made a lot didn't he?" The little girl voice became a bit more expansive and broader in scope, seeming to encompass everything before us, "He made all this, in order to learn how to make Earth in 7 days."

I laughed. "But God doesn't make mistakes supposedly." I stopped wondering if I should tell her that I wasn't a big believer in an all powerful omnipotent being. And that being the case, I didn't believe that the world was made in seven days. I've found that most people ... get odd when I tell them that. (In fact I'm having reservations now about even posting this.) There were also the implications associated with so many mistakes, and if true, it explains a LOT. In general.

I could hear the smirk in her voice as she answered my unspoken criticism, in a sing-song voice,"That's what YOU think."

And I woke up. Weird WEIRD dream. What did I get out of this? That it's alright to make mistakes. You have to learn somehow. I could go in a completely different direction with it, but essentially she wasn't talking about God. She was talking about actions and results. Made a mistake? That's alright. Just figure out what you did wrong in the given situation, and then move on and try again. Don't freak out because you looked stupid, or you lost your job or whatever. Embrace the mistake, Learn from the mistake, Apply that knowledge to the next similar situation. Its just that simple.

As odd as this sound, I know I'm right because the sleeping hind brain hasn't risen from its slumber to raze me with its caustic wit. ... Yet.

.... and yes, I know. You all think I'm totally nuts now, and are wondering if you should even come back to this blog in the future, and risk contamination through reading it.

Its okay. I understand.